Boys Vs Girls

I read this forwarded email yesterday. It's supposed to be a "cry" of a guy's heart about women. It is (my self-presumed) written by a guy who (most probably) doesn't have a girlfriend. How do I know he (most probably) doesn't have a girlfriend? Wait until you read what he wrote, then you will see WHY he doesn't have one. Haha. Fine, actually I found this list quite amusing. So girls, you can read it as an entertainment. Guys, you are welcome to argue.

And no, I didn't mean to insult this guy, or any guys in general. He did get a point here and there, but still the things he pointed out are common things about women that all guys (again, selfish self-presumed) should have known.

I will comment the list just because I cannot stand not to argue, haha.. (my comment in blue)

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Read and learn!! (I will)

We always hear "the rules" from the female side. Now here are the rules from the male side. These are our rules! Please note these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE (haha)! Print this out and pass to your partner for a greater understanding: (print out and pass? don't you think she will assume you're too scared to say it at her face?)

1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us [beep][beep][beep][beep][beep]ing about you leaving it down.

argument: *slap everyone, ya boys and girls* WAKE UP y'all!! Right now I'm [beep][beep][beep][beep][beep]ing, because you are fighting over toilet seats when there are actually other things to think about other than toilet seats!! Duh..Me and bf never have problem with this. If it's down when he wants to use, he lifts it up. If it's up when I want to use, I put it down. THAT easy.

solution: buy two toilet bowls, a normal one, and male-only one. OR simply do what my bf and I do, which is lift-up and put-down.

1. Birthdays, Valentines, and Anniversaries are not quests to see if we can find the perfect present yet again!

argument: and let you anyhow buy some stupid stuffed animals at the nearest shopping centre an hour before we meet up for romantic dinner?? yeah right..Get your lazy ass up and think of something!

solution: I repeat..Get your lazy ass up and think of something!! Okay, the point is what we want is not a perfect gift, what we want is a gift that is acquired and given with all your heart. And yes, we KNOW if it's only a last minute gift..Believe me..It's written all over your face..

1. Sometimes we are not thinking about you. Live with it.

argument:Oh, I'm living with every second of it in joy! So you think we're thinking about you all the time? Sorry, but we have other better things to think about also. The Leopard booties, that new Zara dress, the cool leather jacket, the stacking laundry (ya, sorry but sometimes dirty laundry is more important than you), the entertainment shows, world peace, and sooo many other things.

solution:Okay, maybe sometimes we require more time together. But we're girls. Girls are supposed to be pampered once in a while. That's how we are. Live with it. Just give her a few minutes to just cuddle, and then you can proceed with your soccer game. How 'bout that?

1. Don't cut your hair, Ever. Long hair is always more attractive than short hair. One of the big reasons guys fear getting married is that married women always cut their hair, and by then you're stuck with her.

argument: well, this convince me that the person who write this is a complete idiot. "Don't cut your hair, Ever" is the worst style suggestion I have ever heard. Let me just show you pictures that explain why.

which one you want us to look like?

solution: don't say anything about your girlfriend hair unless more than 5 people tell you that you have a good sense of style.

1. Crying is blackmail.

argument: we're chicks, and we cry. Not to threaten you, but because we're sad or upset, or happy, or shocked, or anything. We cry because of almost all reason. Live with it, and act like a man.

solution: instead of becoming a paranoid and ask us to stop crying, just be a man and give your shoulder to cry on. Instead of saying "please stop" or "what the hell happened?", just say "it's okay"

1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it!

argument: I always say anything in my mind loud and clear. So I cannot really comment on this. I cannot really stand people who talk using hints either.

1. We don't remember dates. Mark birthdays and anniversaries on a calendar. Remind us frequently beforehand.

argument:this guy is an idiot. Did I say that already? You don't remember dates? Do you remember when that coolest game of the year is going to be launched? I bet you do. Your girlfriend's birthday and anniversary. Two dates only, and you can't remember? You need to check your brain, dude!

1. Most guys own three pairs of shoes -- tops. What makes you think we'd be any good at choosing which pair, out of thirty, would look good with your dress?

argument: Hallooo?? we're asking your opinion only! Just say which one you think is good! We will go with our own choice anyway. We're just asking your opinion, just because you're special, and we want to look good, so that you can be proud walking with a beautiful girlfriend wearing shoes that match her dress!! It's all for you man!

1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

You: honey, what's for dinner?

Me: No

You: What do you mean no? You don't cook?

Me: Yes

You: Why? I'm starving..

Me: No

Hmmm, okay, I can live doing that. Can you??

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

argument:What's so hard with holding your crying girlfriend (because she just got bullied by her colleague) and just kiss her on the forehead, and calm her down? You prefer squeezing your brain juice to find solutions and talk a long talk? When we come home crying, you prefer we call our girlfriends and talk, while you are sitting there doing nothing, just because we're looking for sympathy other than solutions? You're weird man.

1. Check your oil! Please.

What oil? Anyone knows what this guy is talking about?

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days.

This guy is flicker-minded and those scared of commitment type. He even refused to be responsible of what he said..

1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us. We refuse to answer.

argument:If we think we're fat, we think we're fat. The reason we ask you is to get some comfort and encouragement. And it doesn't help if you refuse to answer.

solution:just say "Maybe you gain a little weight, but I still love you no matter what. What if we go exercise together? I still want to see you in that new little black dress ;)" If you say that, we will just love you more. And the fact that you encourage us to lose some weight by doing exercise and even offer yourself to accompany us is the greatest encouragement ever.

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.

coward

1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

I often do this to my boyfriend. He fixed the toilet door, something that I'm certainly unable to do. But I stood there with him telling him to do this and that. I know it's annoying but sometimes I cannot stand not to say it. My BF just laugh it off. I'm so lucky to have him :)

1. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.

Me: "Uhh..honey?"

You: "Shh, wait until commercials"

Me: "...."

after 10 mins, and it's commercials

You: "What?"

Me: "Half of the house is on fire" (Okay it's not possible, but i'm just trying to give an extreme example)

1. Christopher Columbus did not need directions, and neither do we.

I'm ridiculously bad in directions myself, so I have no rights to argue.

1. All men see in only 16 colours, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a colour. We have no idea what mauve is.

This morning I asked my BF whether he knows what fuschia is or not. As I expected he doesn't know. So I told him. Then I asked what indigo is. He said it's blue. I asked what kind of blue. He said bright blue. I don't bother to explain. I asked what turquoise is. He said, "tortoise is turtle that live on land." I gave up. Guys DO see in only 16 colours.

1. We are not mind readers and we never will be. Our lack of mind-reading ability is not proof of how little we care about you.

We didn't ask you to mind-read us, 'cause that will be scary (We don't want you to know that we think the guy we just passed was cute). We just want you to use your brain and think a bit beyond what we say. Or at least ask something when you see our sulky face expression, instead of staying quite because we don't say anything.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

argument:Actually I'm not those kind of girls who say "nothing" when something is obviously wrong. But I assume a lot of girls do things like this (from what I see on TV). So guys, my advise, when a girl says "nothing" to that question, ask again!

One note for this guy, you know she's lying, but it's just not worth the hassle? Are you stupid or what? I guess that's why you don't have a girlfriend. I know you don't. It's because you don't know how to treat a girl.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine. Really.

argument: Okay, I'll wear my green polka-dot maxi skirt, with purple-red striped shirt, and a set of colorful bangles, three layers of croc's teeth necklace, a blue cowbay's hat, and mustard-color cowboys boots. Hey, I wear a matching cowboy's hat and boots.

"How do I look, dear?"

"...."

"Why you keep quiet? Does my look amaze you?*wink*"

If you don't run away after seeing your girlfriend dressed as said, you must have come from another planet.

1. You have enough clothes.

argument: Bear this in mind! Girls will NEVER have enough clothes. If you choose to live with two shirts, one pants, three undies, and two pair of shoes, then fine, live your life. We choose to live in colors and styles! Haha..

1. You have too many shoes.

argument: I do have too many shoes. And too many shoes are just never enough. Enough said.

1. BEER is as exciting for us as handbags are for you.

I won't argue on this. Beer is exciting for me too, although handbags are a bit more exciting.

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Okay, I'm not a feminist. And I did this post out of fun, just to release some long-kept anger on men (thanks to all my ex-boyfriends). I know that girls can be annoying to boys, and boys to girls. But it's just because we're different, and hey, that's what makes the whole relationship thing special, right. So boys and girls, live with the difference and be considerate. That's all I can say.

Fiuh, long post, I hope I don't bore you with it. Have a nice day all! Tomorrow's weekend :)